By "slow", I mean a week without any glaring language humiliations, bizarro international trips, or delicious new Belgian beers to report.
It's not that I haven't humiliated myself in the last 168 hours while speaking the Dutch language.
It's just that the humiliation hasn't crossed the threshold of what might be interesting to strangers.
Somebody on the Internet has to have standards!
So instead, I present to you a Bert and Ernie classic: Bread and Peanut Butter, in which Bert and Ernie learn the critical life skill of cooperating.
Only it's overdubbed in Dutch, so instead of Bread and Peanut Butter, it's Brood and Pindakaas.
You can see why this has a special place in my heart.
But before you click the button, I need to deploy a viewer advisory.
If you've never learned Dutch and don't plan to, go ahead and dive in.
In addition to brood and pindakaas, you'll hear Bert talk about samenwerking, which means working together, and lekker, which means all kinds of things in addition to delicious.
You may also be interested to observe the clipped Dutch way that Ernie pronounces "Bert" and the downright freaky way that Bert says around the 10-second mark: O, ik ben dol op Pindakaas. Dank je Ernie! / O! I am fond of peanut butter! Thank you, Ernie!
(Even if you hate it when people resort to YouTube crapola instead of writing a proper blog entry, it's worth making it to the O Ernie! I am fond of pindakaas part.)
But it you're like me, and you've learned Dutch after growing up on the original 1970s version of Sesame Street, I don't really recommend watching this.
It's going to ruin your childhood.
For one thing, the men doing the voiceovers for Bert and Ernie are — without question — Dutch beet farmers who were plucked out of some rainy polder for a 1970s version of Holland's Got Talent.
